12 Body Language

My name is Lorena. I was born in Mexico and came to the United States when I was two.According to Mexican culture, when spoken to by an adult, children show respect by bowing their heads and not looking the adult directly in the eye. This way of showing respect caused me a problem when I went to school.

It was a sunny September morning,my first day at my new private school. The only person I knew was Tina, a girl from my Sunday school, and we sat next to each other and talked. The whole class was talking and giggling; everyone was happy to see old friends again.

Mrs. Georges asked us to be quiet. Then she passed out papers with addition and subtraction problems. Almost immediately, Tina asked me, “What did you get for number four? ” I started to tell her, but Mrs. Georges called out, “Lorena, turn around and be quiet! ”Just then, the school secretary came into the room with a message for Mrs. Georges. While they were busy speaking, Tina asked me another question. I turned to tell her to stop. Mrs. Georges must have seen me. She called out, “Lorena, come up here right now! ”

My hands got moist. My heart beat fast. I took slow, short steps up to Mrs. Georges's desk. In a whisper I said, “Yes, Mrs. Georges? ”I looked down at the floor. Mrs. Georges asked, “What were you doing? ” I kept my head down and didn't say anything. Her voice got louder. “What were you doing? ”

The next thing I knew, Mrs. Georges grabbed my arm tightly.“Look at me when I speak to you! ” she said, and she made me look at her.I was scared because I had never before looked into the face of an adult who was speaking to me—not even my parents or grandparents.

For the rest of the day I felt very upset, and when I got home, I told my parents what happened. The next day, my mom went to school with me. We met with Mrs. Georges and explained that in our culture it was disrespectful to look an older person in the eye. Mrs. Georges explained that in American culture it was disrespectful not to look someone in the eye. When I understood, I told Mrs. Georges that I was sorry. She said she was sorry too, and then she gave me a great big hug.

As a result of this experience I always try to look at anyone who is speaking. I'm a part of America because I live here. I have had to adapt,and now I tell my own child to look at me when I speak to her. I do not want her to experience what I did. That day in school, Mrs. Georges and I learned something about each other's culture. We learned the hard way, but it helped us both.