第69章

He held her close,but he said nothing.He would never say anything.She crept nearer to him,nearer,only to be near to the sensual wonder of him.

And out of his utter,incomprehensible stillness,she felt again the slow momentous,surging rise of the phallus again,the other power.And her heart melted out with a kind of awe.

And this time his being within her was all soft and iridescent,purely soft and iridescent,such as no consciousness could seize.Her whole self quivered unconscious and alive,like plasm.She could not know what it was.She could not remember what it had been.Only that it had been more lovely than anything ever could be.Only that.And afterwards she was utterly still,utterly unknowing,she was not aware for how long.And he was still with her,in an unfathomable silence along with her.And of this,they would never speak.

When awareness of the outside began to come back,she clung to his breast,murmuring 'My love!My love!'And he held her silently.And she curled on his breast,perfect.

But his silence was fathomless.His hands held her like flowers,so still aid strange.'Where are you?'she whispered to him.

'Where are you?Speak to me!Say something to me!'

He kissed her softly,murmuring:'Ay,my lass!'

But she did not know what he meant,she did not know where he was.In his silence he seemed lost to her.

'You love me,don't you?'she murmured.

'Ay,tha knows!'he said.'But tell me!'she pleaded.

'Ay!Ay!'asn't ter felt it?'he said dimly,but softly and surely.

And she clung close to him,closer.He was so much more peaceful in love than she was,and she wanted him to reassure her.

'You do love me!'she whispered,assertive.And his hands stroked her softly,as if she were a flower,without the quiver of desire,but with delicate nearness.And still there haunted her a restless necessity to get a grip on love.

'Say you'll always love me!'she pleaded.

'Ay!'he said,abstractedly.And she felt her questions driving him away from her.

'Mustn't we get up?'he said at last.

'No!'she said.

But she could feel his consciousness straying,listening to the noises outside.

'It'll be nearly dark,'he said.And she heard the pressure of circumstances in his voice.She kissed him,with a woman's grief at yielding up her hour.

He rose,and turned up the lantern,then began to pull on his clothes,quickly disappearing inside them.Then he stood there,above her,fastening his breeches and looking down at her with dark,wide-eyes,his face a little flushed and his hair ruffled,curiously warm and still and beautiful in the dim light of the lantern,so beautiful,she would never tell him how beautiful.It made her want to cling fast to him,to hold him,for there was a warm,half-sleepy remoteness in his beauty that made her want to cry out and clutch him,to have him.She would never have him.So she lay on the blanket with curved,soft naked haunches,and he had no idea what she was thinking,but to him too she was beautiful,the soft,marvellous thing he could go into,beyond everything.

'I love thee that I call go into thee,'he said.

'Do you like me?'she said,her heart beating.

'It heals it all up,that I can go into thee.I love thee that tha opened to me.I love thee that I came into thee like that.'

He bent down and kissed her soft flank,rubbed his cheek against it,then covered it up.

'And will you never leave me?'she said.

'Dunna ask them things,'he said.

'But you do believe I love you?'she said.

'Tha loved me just now,wider than iver tha thout tha would.But who knows what'll 'appen,once tha starts thinkin'about it!'

'No,don't say those things!--And you don't really think that I wanted to make use of you,do you?'

'How?'

'To have a child--?'

'Now anybody can 'ave any childt i'th'world,'he said,as he sat down fastening on his leggings.

'Ah no!'she cried.'You don't mean it?'

'Eh well!'he said,looking at her under his brows.'This wor t'best.'

She lay still.He softly opened the door.The sky was dark blue,with crystalline,turquoise rim.He went out,to shut up the hens,speaking softly to his dog.And she lay and wondered at the wonder of life,and of being.

When he came back she was still lying there,glowing like a gipsy.He sat on the stool by her.

'Tha mun come one naight ter th'cottage,afore tha goos;sholl ter?'

he asked,lifting his eyebrows as he looked at her,his hands dangling between his knees.

'Sholl ter?'she echoed,teasing.

He smiled.'Ay,sholl ter?'he repeated.

'Ay!'she said,imitating the dialect sound.

'Yi!'he said.

'Yi!'she repeated.

'An'slaip wi'me,'he said.'It needs that.When sholt come?'

'When sholl I?'she said.

'Nay,'he said,'tha canna do't.When sholt come then?'

''Appen Sunday,'she said.

''Appen a'Sunday!Ay!'

He laughed at her quickly.

'Nay,tha canna,'he protested.

'Why canna I?'she said.