第81章
What! mustn't a lady move an inch from her door without being dogged like a thief?'
`But how was we to know, if you left no account of your doings?' expostulated Coggan, `and ladies don't drive at these hours, miss, as a jineral rule of society.
`I did leave an account - and you would have seen it in the morning.
I wrote in chalk on the coach-house doors that I had come back for the horse and gig, and driven off; that I could arouse nobody, and should return soon.
`But you'll consider, ma'am, that we couldn't see that till it got daylight.'
`True,' she said, and though vexed at first she had too much sense to blame them long or seriously for a devotion to her that was as valuable as it was rare. She added with a very pretty grace, `Well, I really thank you heartily for taking all this trouble; but I wish you had borrowed anybody's horses but Mr Boldwood's.'
`Dainty is lame, miss,' said Coggan. `Can ye go on?'
`It was only a stone in her shoe. I got down and pulled it out a hundred yards back. I can manage very well, thank you. I shall be in Bath by daylight.
Will you now return, please?'
She turned her head - the gateman's candle shimmering upon her quick, clear eyes as she did so - passed through the gate, and was soon wrapped in the embowering shades of mysterious summer boughs. Coggan and Gabriel put about their horses, and fanned by the velvety air of this July night, retraced the road by which they had come.
`A strange vagary, this of hers, isn't it, Oak?' said Coggan curiously.
`Yes,' said Gabriel shortly. `She won't be in Bath by no daylight!'
`Coggan, suppose we keep this night's work as quiet as we can?'
`I am of one and the same mind.'
`Very well. We shall be home by three o'clock or so, and can creep into the parish like lambs.'
Bathsheba's perturbed meditations by the roadside had ultimately evolved a conclusion that there were only two remedies for the present desperate state of affairs. The first was merely to keep Troy away from Weatherbury till Boldwood's indignation had cooled; the second to listen to Oak's entreaties, and Boldwood's denunciations, and give up Troy altogether.
Alas! Could she give up this new love - induce him to renounce her by saying she did not like him - could no more speak to him, and beg him, for her good, to end his furlough in Bath, and see her and Weatherbury no more?
It was a picture fall of misery, but for a while she contemplated it firmly, allowing herself, nevertheless, as girls will, to dwell upon the happy life she would have enjoyed had Troy been Boldwood, and the path of love the path of duty - inflicting upon herself gratuitous tortures by imagining him the lover of another woman after forgetting her; for she had penetrated Troy's nature so far as to estimate his tendencies pretty accurately, but unfortunately loved him no less in thinking that he might soon cease to love her - indeed, considerably more.
She jumped to her feet. She would see him at once. Yes, she would implore him by word of mouth to assist her in this dilemma. A letter to keep him away could not reach him in time, even if he should be disposed to listen to it.
Was Bathsheba altogether blind to the obvious fact that the support of a lover's arms is not of a kind best calculated to assist a resolve to renounce him? Or was she sophistically sensible, with a thrill of pleasure, that by adopting this course for getting rid of him she was ensuring a meeting with him, at any rate, once more?
It was now dark, and the hour must have been nearly ten. The only way to accomplish her purpose was to give up her idea of visiting Liddy at Yalbury, return to Weatherbury Farm, put the horse into the gig, and drive at once to Bath. The scheme seemed at first impossible; the journey was a fearfully heavy one, even for a strong horse, at her own estimate,. and she much underrated the distance. It was most venturesome for a woman, at night, and alone.
But could she go on to Liddy's and leave things to take their course?
No, no: anything but that. Bathsheba was fall of a stimulating turbulence, beside which caution vainly prayed for a hearing. She turned back towards the village.
Her walk was slow, for she wished not to enter Weatherbury till the cottagers were in bed, and, particularly, till Boldwood was secure. Her plan was now to drive to Bath during the night, see Sergeant Troy in the morning before he set out to come to her, bid him farewell, and dismiss him; then to rest the horse thoroughly (herself to weep the while, she thought), starting early the next morning on her return journey. By this arrangement she could trot Dainty gently all the day, reach Liddy at Yalbury in the evening, and come home to Weatherbury with her whenever they chose - so nobody would know she had been to Bath at all.
Such was Bathsheba's scheme. But in her topographical ignorance as a later comer to the place, she misreckoned the distance of her journey as not much more than half what it really was. Her idea, however, she proceeded to carry out, with what initial success we have already seen.